A week of parenting fails in pictures

Well it’s been another turbulent week here. Seeing as I have almost 14 years of being a parent under my belt, you’d have thought I would have my shit together by now. Alas, I will never learn but you, dear reader, can learn a thing or two from the times I have messed up.


Screen Shot 2016-04-14 at 19.19.16

I live in West London. There are some nice areas and some not so nice areas which all happen to be a stones throw apart. I favour the not so nice part of my town as it has a Wilkinson’s and four, yes four, pound shops. Oh, and an Iceland.

Anyhow, I know they say that sleeping outside in the fresh air is good for young children; but did they mean on West Ealing Broadway? No matter though, she was awoken pretty quickly when two police cars tuned up to the dodgy dry cleaners (which I am sure is a front for something else), sirens roaring a few moments later.

I also inadvertently parked the pushchair on a tramps cardboard box and was told off quite sternly when he returned and when I apologised, he threatened to throw a bottle of piss at me unless I gave him a pound.

Tuesday night/early hours of Wednesday :

Screen Shot 2016-04-14 at 19.30.52

This was taken at 3am. She had been awake for two hours by this point. I gave up and let her play the Family Guy game on my iPad, turned over and went to sleep. I am assuming she fell asleep when the battery ran out.


My thirteen year old told me that his friends have much higher quality packed lunches than he does. I know they do, we live in West London. I have an acquaintance who rises at 5.30am to make her little darlings fresh sushi in those daft bento boxes for their school lunches.

I had little sleep the night before and was not in the mood to be compared to the local Stepford Wives, so I made him this:

Screen Shot 2016-04-14 at 19.19.28


Backfired though, didn’t it? He thought a crisp sandwich was the best lunch ever. Arsehole.


Screen Shot 2016-04-14 at 19.18.52

My toddler loves Mr Bloom and wanted to do ‘garden things’. I could’ve gone out and excitedly bought seeds and little garden tools, but no. These are the only plants in my garden, and they are plastic ones from IKEA. She’s two; she’ll cope.


Screen Shot 2016-04-14 at 19.18.32

Easter can fuck off. All it taught my toddler was that all eggs are made of chocolate. I served her egg and soldiers, and her eyes lit up. “Choccy! Choccy!” were her exact words when she saw it. Ever tried to reason with a toddler? It didn’t end well, and nor did biting into the shell.

I am awaiting the weekend with baited breath.



  1. this is brilliant love the idea and the post. Parenting fails appear to be the story of my life at the moment but I must start capturing them as memories 😉 thanks for sharing madde me laugh #fartglitter


  2. I do enjoy a crisp sandwich and can sadly see why this backfired….next time, just do a lettuce sandwich. No butter, just literally lettuce. That’ll get him. Enjoyed reading this one 🙂 #TwinklyTuesday


  3. You crease me up! I love the packed lunch fail, and the ” I am assuming she fell asleep when the battery ran out” bit. I am tempted to start my own #fail photo journal, but I don’t currently have any room on my phone thanks to 1794 photos of my daughter’s left nostril. Somebody has been playing with my phone today #fail. Thanks for linking with #fartglitter x


  4. This is great! I think we should talk more about our mistakes, not just our triumphs. We all have parenting fails, some more epic than others. It just goes to show that we are human! #fartglitter


  5. That packed lunch looks ace honest! My dad used to chuck £2 at me and make me buy my own! I would have done anything for a homemade lunch! I’ve got two little crazy kids too and a book full of fails. Looks like your kicking parentings arse though! go you! #TwinklyTuesday


  6. Love this! I think everyone has at least one parenting fail every day..I know I do. Love the last photo, did she actually bite into the shell?!xx #fartglitter


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s